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You are probably here because you have heard Tinder is a great app for hookups and want to know how to get laid on tinder.
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Well, you are absolutely right there!
Step #2: Tinder hook up openers. Time to arm you with the best hook up openers. And possibly shock you with a plot twist. In the last tip, I just told you to step away from aimless chit chat. If you want to hook up, you want to arm yourself with texts that are funny, teasing, and even challenging. How to Hookup on Tinder (A Woman’s Guide) Tinder has now introduced a ' Tinder Plus ' hookup: So, what are the app to Tinder Plus that make it worth all that extra hookup? Here are some of the touted benefits.
In this article, I will bring you ton terms on how to:
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'Serious Relationships' | 'Discreet Hookups' | 'Best Course' |
'Quick Flings' | 'Normal Hookups' | 'Our Quiz' |
Ready to get hooked? Take the bait!
Is tinder giving you the best chance of success with online dating? Take our dating app quiz to find out. People who follow our app recommendations have an average of 2 more dates/casual meetups per month.- This article on Tinder is part of my larger Tinder hub (50+ articles)
- Pick up my free Tinder opening line formula to easily 3X your response rate.
- Guys: I suggest Tinder coach if you want to increase your matches
Tinder Hook-Up Guide in Video Form
Audio (podcast) form for those of you on the go
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Setting up a Profile for Hook-Ups
Today, Tinder is the most popular dating app out there – mainly because it spans a wide range of people seeking various relationships (from casual hookups to long-term relationships).
But other sites mainly focus on instant hookups (like BeNaughty or Ashley Madison) and others that pride themselves in matching potential life partners (like eHarmony).
With that said, you should always know there are girls on Tinder who are always interested in hook-ups and casual sex – you can easily get it whenever from them.
These girls don’t care how you look, what you say, or what you have to offer.
Some girls don’t want to do anything, except tease, but we will help you to turn a no into a yes.
After a few catchy messages and flirty conversation, you can expect a date that will probably end at either your place or hers.
Easy hook up right?
Well, not so easy pal, read on to find out how to hook up with a girl and score yourself that Tinder date.
With these steps below, you will easily grab the attention of any cutie and even increase your chances of getting her number.
1. Carefully choose your photos
The profile picture is the first thing girls will see on your Tinder profile and if a picture is bad, you shouldn’t expect many Tinder hook-ups.
This is quite a superficial dating site and deciding whether to like someone or not is mostly based on looks.
Lucky for you, you don’t have to look like a superstar to find girls.
All you have to do is upload a decent picture – but definitely not that bathroom selfie.
If you can’t decide whether a picture is good or bad, ask a few people around you.
You could also ask other people to photograph you and tell you how to pose to get the best shots.
When it comes to the profile picture, always show your better side.
Everyone has a profile that they find more photogenic than the other, and you will look more confident in the photo if the right angle is shown.
With just a little bit of effort, you can get a few amazing shots that will make girls start swiping right without hesitation and probably land you your first date in no time.
When we are talking about other pics, try showing off some of your other qualities.
Now she knows you have an attractive face, but show her the rest as well.
You can upload a picture in a great suit or one where you are showing off your masculine body.
Also, pictures from your previous skiing trip or summer vacation are welcomed!
2. Take your time when writing a bio
Just listing your likes or random information is boring, and she will probably stop reading your Tinder bio after two words.
When she finds you uninteresting without even talking to you, say goodbye to any possibility of meeting her in person.
A bio is a great way to stand out among other guys.
Even if you are on Tinder just for an occasional fling or a date hook-up, she doesn’t need to know that upfront immediately.
Guys that write “just looking for a hook-up”, usually don’t get many at the end, because women swipe left on them.
Over 80% of men do not write good bios and the ones that put in the effort when creating their profile, significantly increase their chances of a future Tinder hook-up.
The bio should show your personality and the best traits.
If you need inspiration for writing one, check out these examples:
3. Set up new social media profiles
You’ve probably had your Facebook account for years and I’m assuming it is the same with Instagram.
You can always archive or delete some of the embarrassing or old pictures, but it might be a bit time-consuming.
Set up new accounts to link with the app.
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Follow the pages that girls follow, show Tinder users that you have similar preferences and interests, and use these accounts to represent yourself the way you want to.
Put more thought into your future posts to your dating profile.
Before uploading a new picture or sharing something, think about how it might affect your dating life.
Sexist posts won’t get you far, and the same goes for dull captions under photos.
Texting and Hooking Up
You matched with one of the beauties!
Great, but what to do next?
Should you text first?
Or would it make you look like a loser and it might be better to wait for her message?
Don’t worry, we covered everything about texting and hooking up: which pick-up lines work the best, great conversation starters, and most importantly, how to keep the conversation going.
There are also plenty of examples and you can try some of them with one of the girls.
With just a few well-written messages, you will get the best Tinder hook-ups!
1. Starting a conversation
Remember, she already has plenty of guys in her inbox, showering her with compliments and desperate for her attention.
You need to find a way to stand out just a little bit!
Good openings improve the possibility of date or sex by almost five times.
Messages such as “hi gorgeous” won’t work, because her inbox is flooded by the same or similar messages.
She already knows you are interested – that is what swipe right means.
Also, simple messages as “hi”, “hey”, “hello” are just as bad.
It really can’t be that hard to come up with something a bit more interesting.
A good conversation starter will grab her attention, it is something she will have to reply to, and it represents you as a smart and humorous guy.
Usually, it is best to write something she can relate to and you can always go through her profile, social media, and other linked accounts to find something.
Those Tinder questions really come in handy in these situations (supposing she has answered them).
After reading the answers, refer to one of them and write her a text you would send to an old friend or person you already know.
The text can be a bit teasing and she will answer promptly.
This is one of the most common openers, but unfortunately, not all girls have detailed bio.
In those cases, you should focus on her pictures.
If she has posted a picture from a party or a trip, make a comment about the photo.
You can also comment on her looks, but do not use generic comments!
Think of something new that she will gladly respond to and not ignore.
These are some of the best conversation starters that have the best response rate.
We won’t leave you without any examples, so take a look at these.
2. Inviting her out
If she answered your first message, she will probably respond to others as well.
She is already interested, so you shouldn’t worry about keeping the conversation going and inviting her on a date.
After a few messages, start getting to know each other.
If you know each other a bit better, the hook-up is more likely to happen.
Ask her about her job or studies, the place she lives, or anything else that pops into your mind.
You can also share with her anything funny you found online – a meme, video, or article.
Also, if you saw anything that instantly reminded you of her, send it to her.
Once you know each other better, she will start opening up a bit more and you can even start joking around and flirting.
Also, when she relaxes a bit, you can openly ask for her phone number.
Chatting on Tinder is okay, but if you manage to move to another app, hook-up is guaranteed!
With her number, you will easily stand out from all of the losers in her inbox and be certain that you’ve gained her trust.
Now that you have her number, make sure that you are messaging and communicating as much as you were on Tinder.
If the conversation is naturally flowing, you can suggest going on a date.
It is best to suggest it when she is least expecting it.
When she mentions a food she loves or any activity she enjoys, ask her to try it out together.
She sees you as someone who can break the monotony of her daily life.
That is why the answer will probably be positive.
Even though, the chances of turning you down are low, be careful about suggestions and make sure you are proposing something she would really be excited to try!
You probably figured out what she likes and which places she prefers from the conversation.
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If she said she likes beer, suggest visiting a good pub.
If she likes to party, you can probably think of a great club.
Obviously, if she is a vegetarian, don’t invite her to grab a burger.
Think about something she will certainly say yes to!
Another trick to keep her interested is to leave a few details to herself.
She doesn’t need to know everything about the place you plan on taking her.
For example, suggest checking out an amazing bar, but meeting somewhere else and keeping the exact location a mystery.
Most likely, she will be much more excited about the date and find out where are you going next.
3. Should you sext?
If she is open to it, definitely yes!
When sexting happens, your chances of future hook-up increase significantly.
It is a sign she is definitely interested in you and wants to see you as soon as possible.
You are probably wondering who should initiate this type of conversation.
Well, it depends.
Many girls on Tinder have no problem with sexting and usually start flirting first.
After a few messages, she sends a provocative message and you can answer the same.
It might even result in a few nude images as well or an invitation to come over.
If she isn’t starting this conversation, but you would want to, go for it!
Of course, only if she has shown interest in you or she might think you are creepy and rude.
When the conversation is flowing, write a dirty joke, and from her reaction, you can determine whether it is a good time for sexting or not.
Once you start exchanging messages, be aware of how much you reveal.
Girls love to keep a few things to their imagination, so just give her a few details to tease her.
Slowly give away a few more, but do not end the story.
Now she can’t wait to see you and experience everything you talked about.
Sexting is great for building up tension, and you can expect the best Tinder hook-up soon after it.
Things You Should Avoid Doing
Even the best conversation can be ruined by a stupid mistake if you lack basic etiquette.
Almost every guy has gone through this when first joining Tinder.
After losing a shot with an incredible girl, they learn their lesson and never repeat these mistakes.
Firstly, never share your underwear photos!
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Sexting is fine and if you started exchanging nude photos even better!
But don’t just send her the picture of your boxers without her asking for it.
Girls don’t find men in underwear sexy or in any way exciting.
She will only start thinking of you as a creep and quickly click that block button.
The same goes for dick picks.
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If she asked for it, great!
However, if she didn’t, keep it to yourself.
Those types of pictures aren’t great openers and you will probably only get a report.
Lastly, you should never be too straightforward.
We get it – Tinder is a hook-up app and many are using it only for finding flings.
But that doesn’t mean you have to tell it to her face.
Girls are always worried about how someone might perceive their needs and they love to hide them.
Of course, the date will end in a one-night-stand, but don’t tell her you only want that and nothing else.
How to Turn a No Into a Yes
OFL exclusive offers - Check all of them | ||
---|---|---|
'Serious Relationships' | 'Discreet Hookups' | 'Best Course' |
'Quick Flings' | 'Normal Hookups' | 'Our Quiz' |
Many girls on Tinder love to tease.
In one moment, she is flirting with you, but as soon as you mention going on a date or at least about her number, she says no.
This can go on for a while and even after a few days of texting, she still doesn’t want to meet up with you in real life.
Also, many guys meet up with girls, the date is going well, but as soon as they try to make a move, women pull away.
Lucky for you, there is a way to change her answer from no to yes.
Women don’t easily overcome certain blocks or barriers.
It might take a bit more pursuing to get what you want.
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She might also have some of those rules such as “you can sleep with someone after three dates”.
Keep in mind that by forcing her to do something, you won’t get far.
If she feels pushed to do something, she will resist you even more and you will go home alone.
Firstly, talk to her about why she doesn’t want to do something and gain her trust.
She trusted you enough to meet up so she will gain your trust for other things as well.
On the date, keep some mystery, be flirty and joke around.
The excitement will slowly rise, she will start relaxing and she will forget about her rules or barriers.
If those things do not work, then you definitely should push it too much.
A hook-up should feel natural, so when she is not down for it, it is best to just call it a night.
Best Places to Hook-Up
Now you have the profile that will attract girls and with those few tricks, you can easily get a date and look forward to your next date.
Let’s take a look at some of the best hookup spots.
Is one city really better for casual dating than the other?
The answer is yes!
If you aren’t from the USA, you should consider traveling there and visiting some of the top Tinder cities.
This is one of the most popular dating apps there, but only that, in these cities, you can expect to easily find your next hookup.
Just scroll through the feed, swipe right and soon you will have plenty of girls to choose from!
Here is a list of the best cities for Tinder:
1. New York City
Well, we have to start with the biggest and most popular USA city.
New Yorkers are quite active and no wonder this is one of the best places to find hookups.
After just one night of partying or one day of going around and exploring the city, you can expect over 30 matches.
Girls are definitely more open, love tourists, and the culture of casual dating is not something foreign to them.
Also, there are plenty of single women!
Women in New York are outnumbering men and almost half of these women are single and a majority of them are using Tinder regularly.
This is their way of breaking the monotony of their life and the easiest way to meet new people.
So choose the girl you want to go out with and enjoy your stay in New York!
2. Atlanta
This city is famous for its hospitality, the Braves and Hawks, and the busiest airport in the world.
You can also expect many single women that can’t wait to show you around and have fun with you.
Just like in NYC, there are more women than men and there are more single women than taken!
Also, single women are quite active on Tinder.
Some of them are looking for a serious relationship, but the majority are fine with flings and use the app just for fun.
So walk around town, swipe right, and watch the number of matches slowly increasing.
3. Miami
If you want to explore different cultures, go to Miami!
Do you prefer Latinas?
Supermodels and actresses?
They are all in Miami.
This city is quite popular among celebrities and I’m guessing many of them love it because of the pretty girls.
Many singles make this city the best place for hookups.
After just one night out, your inbox will be full and you can expect invitations to some of the hottest clubs and wildest parties.
Also, these women aren’t shy.
With them, you don’t have to worry about who will send the first message, or is it okay to send that provocative picture.
Most likely, she will text you first, initiate the date, or just invite you over.
Most and Least Popular Tinder States
Of course, in certain states culture of casual dating is more popular than in the others, and not every state is as open to Tinder and using it just to find sex.
You maybe don’t want to limit yourself to just one city.
Before you buy that plane ticket, find out where you will have the most success and where you shouldn’t expect many matches.
Also, if you live in the USA, find out whether Tinder is popular in your area and whether the lack of popularity might be the reason for the low match rate.
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Rhode Island definitely took first place!
This is the most popular Tinder state and it is probably due to its location.
It is a small state, close to many other popular states, and with a stunning view.
Rhode Island is followed by Maine and in the top ten, there are also Ohio, Washington, Pennsylvania, and Wisconsin.
Surprisingly, if you went to California, you shouldn’t expect many Tinder matches.
It has a pretty poor ranking and didn’t even make it to the top twenty-five states.
The same goes for Nevada – even though you will have a good time in Las Vegas, don’t expect many Tinder notifications.
Worst states for hooking up
Mississippi ranked the last, and Alaska and Oklahoma are just a few ranks above it.
Also, West Virginia and Louisiana are just as poorly ranked, and Utah and California are only a few spaces above them.
Apparently, people in these states do not need Tinder’s help for finding someone to hook up with or they just aren’t into flings and casual dating.
At least now you know where not to travel!
Final Word on Tinder Hookup Guide
There you go, guys.
So is Tinder just for hookups?
No. A few people have actually found their soulmate on Tinder – true that!
If you want to know how to hook up on Tinder and hook up with the girls you like, you will have to know what moves to make and when to make them.
Besides, there is a thing like location that can play a pretty important role in your success and hook-up rate, so if you don’t mind taking a fun trip, I can assure you that you will have a fantastic Tinder experience.
Tinder Hookup FAQs
Research explores why people use Tinder and what kinds of connections they make.
Posted June 11, 2017 Reviewed by Lybi Ma
Key points
- A survey showed the majority of people believe that Tinder is a hookup app.
- The main reason people report using Tinder is that it’s popular and trendy.
- Among those looking for romance, people are more likely to use Tinder to look for a relationship than a hookup.
Since its launch in 2012, the dating app, Tinder, has received quite a bit of publicity. It's one of the most popular lifestyle apps with over 10 million daily active users.
For the uninitiated, Tinder is a mobile dating app that allows users to locate other singles in their geographic area. Users fill out a brief bio and upload photos. They can then start viewing photos of other users who match their age, gender, and location criteria. Users swipe right if they like what they see and swipe left if they don’t. They are then notified of any matches, where both people swiped right on each other's profiles. Thus, users can quickly view hundreds of local singles and decide with a quick swipe of their finger if they’re interested or not.
In the popular media, Tinder very much has the reputation of being a 'hookup' app, designed to facilitate fleeting sexual encounters. At the peak of the Tinder hype, an article in Vanity Fair announced that Tinder represented the 'dawn of the dating apocalypse.' Whereas others in the popular media have suggested that many use the app in search of love.
So, why do people use Tinder?
Two recent studies shed some light on all of the hype.
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A recently published study by Leah LeFebvre surveyed 395 young adults (ages 18 to 34) who said they had used Tinder.1 The study mostly involved open-ended questions regarding users' motivations for and experiences using the app. The researchers then coded participants' responses into categories.
So what was the most commonly cited reason for using Tinder? It's popular: 48.3 percent of the respondents indicated that the main reason they used Tinder revolved around its popularity—the media hype or the fact that many of their peers were using it. Only about 5 percent of those surveyed indicated that the desire for hookups was their main motivation for joining the site. This data is summarized in the table below.
The participants were also asked what was the purpose of Tinder. When it came to people’s perceptions, not surprisingly, they were true to stereotype. 51.5 percent said they believed Tinder was designed for hooking up, 33.5 percent said dating, and 15 percent meeting people.
While this open-ended data is valuable, it doesn't provide the whole story on why people use Tinder. Participants in LeFebvre's study were asked what their main reason was for using the app, but people often have multiple motivations for their behaviors. Someone might primarily have joined Tinder because it seemed like the cool thing to do, but that person might also have a desire to meet a potential romantic partner or hookup.
In another recent study, by Sindy Sumter and colleagues, a sample of 163 Dutch Tinder users rated the extent to which various motives described their reasons for using Tinder.2 The researchers then used a statistical technique to group those ratings into general categories. The categories and the average ratings of the participants for each category are summarized in the table below.
The most common motives for using Tinder: it's exciting and it's trendy. Another common motive that wasn't cited in the LeFebvre study was self-worth validation. It was not uncommon for participants to use the app because they wanted positive feedback on Tinder or because receiving such feedback felt good. Naturally, finding a romantic partner was also a relatively common reason for using Tinder. As can be seen in the table, using the app for casual sex and hookups was actually less common than these other motives.
Not surprisingly, both studies also suggested that men are more likely than women to use Tinder for the purpose of seeking out casual sex.
These studies show that using Tinder meets a variety of psychological needs, beyond the obvious ones relating to dating and sex. Tinder can also be used to fulfill more general social needs. Both studies showed that the trendiness and excitement of the app were larger drivers of its use than motivations that relate to what most users believe to be its purpose (dating, sex). It can also help to fulfill our needs for self-worth. Receiving matches on Tinder can be an ego boost. On the other hand, not receiving matches could damage self-worth, and in fact, LeFebvre found that lack of success on Tinder, including not receiving matches, was one of the main reasons users quit the app.1
What do people do when they get a Tinder match?
In LeFebvre's qualitative study, 77 percent of the respondents indicated that they had met a match in person at some point, with the average participant reporting 4.58 offline meetings with matches. And in fact, 37 percent reported that a Tinder date led to an exclusive dating relationship. What about those infamous hookups? Well, these participants did do plenty of hooking up. Of those who met a Tinder match in person, only 21.8 percent indicated that they had never hooked up. Another 12.6 percent said they had hooked up but it didn’t involve sexual intercourse and another 65.6 percent said their hookups did involve sexual contact. In addition, the average number of hookups reported by the participants was just above three.
Participants in the Dutch study seemed to be less successful on Tinder. Slightly fewer than half of the participants (45.5 percent) had gone on an offline date with a match, and 18.6 percent reported having had a one-night stand. This rate is much lower, but other data from this study indicates that these participants were overall less active on the app than the participants in LeFebvre's study.
How do motives for using Tinder relate to people’s experiences?
You might also be wondering how Tinder users' motives for using the app relate to their actual use of the app. LeFebvre's qualitative data couldn't really address this question, but Sumter and colleagues were able to examine the association between Tinder use motives and participants' likelihood of going on a Tinder date or having a Tinder hookup.2
Those who were looking for love or casual sex were more likely to go on Tinder dates. Not surprisingly, the more that participants indicated casual sex as a motive for using Tinder, the more likely they were to have a one-night stand with a Tinder match. Those who used Tinder as a way to boost their feelings of self-worth were less likely to have a one night stand. Interestingly, those who used Tinder because it seemed like an easier way to meet people were actually less likely to go on dates with Tinder matches. Perhaps these individuals were especially likely to be shy and thus ultimately didn't follow through with their Tinder matches.
So what do we really know about Tinder?
Returning to the question that began this post, is Tinder really a hookup app? Yes and no. Tinder-initiated hookups are quite common, but the notion that Tinder is primarily about hookups is overstated. Tinder users are more likely to be seeking relationships than casual sex. Moreover, dating and sex are not the main reasons that many people are using Tinder.
These two studies give us a window into the motives of Tinder users, but ultimately it's hard to generalize the findings. As I pointed out, the actual dating and hookup experiences of the two samples of participants differed considerably. So which experience is closer to that of the typical Tinder user? It’s hard to definitively say without surveys that seek out a representative sample of Tinder users. Nonetheless, both studies suggest that much of Tinder's popularity is, ironically, due to its popularity. This may not be the best news for those who really do use Tinder to look for love or sex, as they may find that their matches don't take the app very seriously and aren't as interested in following through.
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We also know very little about the long-term prospects of Tinder-initiated relationships. Traditional online dating websites, like match.com, have been around long enough that researchers are starting to understand the prognosis for those relationships and the types of people who use the sites. What does the future hold for Tinder and its users? Only time and more research will tell.
References
1. LeFebvre, L. E. (2017). Swiping me off my feet: Explicating relationship initiation on Tinder. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships. Published online before print. doi: 10.1177/0265407517706419
2. Sumter, S., Vandenbosch, L., & Ligtenberg, L. (2016). Love me Tinder: Untangling emerging adults’ motivations for using the dating application Tinder. Telematics and Informatics, 34(1), 67-78. doi:10.1016/j.tele.2016.04.009